The Great Awakening (part III)

God hates all of you. I would know that for a fact. Until now, only my persuasive tongue had kept him from obliterating all of you. The last time I neglected to do that (I was busy trying to barter some of heaven’s sorely inflated real estate for a few of your lousy souls) God killed a couple million Jews. Not too terrible, but you get how much you owe me. Now that I’ve relocated to Earth (temporarily) on a divine mandate, I suspect Earth will be annihilated within a few decades. So it would suit you well to listen to my words, and correct your lousy selves (or take the shortcut and jump off a cliff. Real estate is a non-issue in hell. Satan only wanted land so he could expand his liberaale-cumuniste collection (that’s devilish for slapstick comedy).